Diary of a Weeds Virgin – massage parlors and strap-ons

by Kona Gallagher

(Season 2, Episodes 4-6)

This batch of episodes really wasn’t great for me. I really enjoy the comic relief that Andy brings to the Botwin household, but the whole massage parlor storyline really rubbed me the wrong way (HA!). Plus, the Silas/Megan storyline went to a weird place, and I pretty much lost all understanding of Peter. There were some high points (again, I SLAY me), but overall, I find myself starting to like Nancy less and less.

2×04 “AKA The Plant”

First and foremost, with a campaign slogan like “Change: it just brings problems,” I would probably vote for dumbass Doug as well. Overall, though, this is my least favorite episode of the series so far. It was just generally kind of boring. They devoted a lot of time to building the grow house, which was mildly amusing at times, but mostly just dragged.

There wasn’t really anything too interesting going on with Peter; he and Nancy went shooting and then he left town. The whole Silas thing on the other hand, got kind of crazy, with Megan getting pregnant due to his sabotage and their decision to keep the baby. Somehow I don’t really see this plan coming to fruition.

I would like to address the whole massage parlor storyline with Shane and Andrew. This is probably the creepiest thing I’ve ever seen on a sitcom before. Andy takes his 11 or 12-year-old nephew to get a handjob from a hooker? What is funny about that? How is that okay? The entire thing just made me feel gross and soured me on the entire episode.

2×05 “Mrs. Botwin’s Neighborhood”

I was still disturbed by the last episode when I started this one, so I was dismayed to find out the whole massage parlor storyline was still going on. Although, I will admit that Andy’s scene with the principal, in which he convinces him that Shane made the entire ridiculous story up, was pretty funny.

The continuation of Silas’s storyline, on the other hand, wasn’t funny at all. I knew that Megan wasn’t going to have the baby, but to be seemingly coerced into having an abortion? That’s pretty messed up. I actually felt really badly for Silas, “The Stupidest Boy In The World.” His father just died, and not only did he think he was going to be a father himself, only to have that ripped away from him, but the man who had been acting as his father figure turned on him. Megan’s dad taught him to drive, and now he won’t let him anywhere near his daughter. I’m not saying I disagree with Megan’s dad’s position on the issue, I’m just saying I actually feel some sympathy for Silas.

The Peter/Nancy storyline continues to get weirder. Instead of keeping a low profile, she actually enlists Peter’s help to scare away some Armenian drug lords. It’s one thing to be a DEA agent and date/marry a woman who has a small pot selling business, but to use your office to scare off her competition? Well, that’s another thing entirely. I liked the Peter character, but ever since the marriage happened, I’ve been weirded out by this whole thing.

2×06 “Crush Girl Love Panic”

There’s probably a lot that I don’t really get about the McMansion set, but one thing is I guess the entitlement. Silas has been a total asshole, so Nancy … buys him a car? But let him know that she was still pissed by … not getting him the BMW convertible? I find this whole thing very interesting. Clearly, Silas is onto something, and I should have played my teenage years way differently.

Things are really going crazy for all of the Botwins this episode. Shane has a crush on a girl, which hasn’t really gone anywhere yet, but I’m excited to see what happens. I really like that little weirdo, and I felt so badly for him when he kicked her because those jerky kids were looking on, about to ridicule him.

Andy’s Rabbinical school teacher has always seemed a little off, but we get to see the extent of it in this episode. What I find so funny about the scene where they go back to her place isn’t the fact that she pulls out this huge strap-on, it’s that he seems kind of resigned to the fact. He’s too intimidated by her to do anything but just let her go for it or something. I get that he’s not really the Alpha male that she usually looks for, but I do think this is a situation in which Andy could probably say, “uh, thanks but no thanks,” but it’s almost as if he doesn’t want to be impolite.