So You Think You Can Dance – Lots of flailing bodies

Alex Wong had to bow out of the competition last week on So You Think You Can Dance. His ruptured Achilles tendon did him in, as noted in last week’s episode.

So, with seven contestants remaining to perform two routines each, it’s onward and upward. Let’s break it down….

And already, barely into introductions, we discover Ashley Galvan is out with severe rib pain from rehearsals on Monday. This means she will not only be sitting out of the competition this week, but she’ll be relegated to the Bottom Three during the elimination round.

Lauren Froderman is up first with a Tahitian number. You like gyrating hips encased in feathers? Good for you. Knocking knees jangling in grassy adornment? Well here you go. I was with Nigel on this one when he said, “I don’t know what to say.” It was just flailing. There was no grace whatsoever to this offering. Typical comments from Nigel (“It would be great for turkeys to do this on Thanksgiving”) and Mia (“It was like a duck in heat”) basically said it all.

After the stray feathers are collected from the stage, it’s salsa time for AdéChiké Torbert. And if you thought the first routine with Lauren was a hot mess, this one was its sequel. After all the neck drops and neck lifts and neck kicks, well … *yeesh* … the poor girl had to have suffered welts the size of Rhode Island all over her neck. Give me a break. The choreography was churning and frantic. I didn’t like it. This was a second ditty that shook all over the place … and that was about it.

Jose Ruiz … Broadway. *sigh* You know how much I dislike Broadway. Minimal dancing … mostly acting. Can we please ramp up the show going forward and get some dancing in? It is SYTYCD, after all … not “So You Think You Can Act.” Even the judges offered doomsayer deadness in their critiques. Hell … Jose himself admitted “I was just really trying to … uhm … play the part … I guess….” If Jose wasn’t even convinced of what he was doing, how are we supposed to be?

Then comes Robert Roldan, putting on a Travis Wall routine based on a story about Travis’ mother. Danced to (a grossly hacked up version of) Coldplay’s “Fix You,” here was a piece that appeared edited during rehearsals to the absolute bare minimum. But, in its briefness, sliced and diced as the song and routine was, we were treated to something extra special. If you aren’t a contemporary fan you could have easily blown this off for a run to the fridge. In so doing, you would have missed a stellar, outstanding performance. (If only Fox would let us have a video….)

A jive routine for Billy Bell comes next. I couldn’t get past his and partner Anya’s black and pink ensemble. Distracting as all get-out. Distracting for Anya, matter’n fact, being she literally got her heel caught up in her skirt. Sorry: This was more flailing fluffery. Even the tune — “Paradise By The Dashboard Light” — sounded frantic, ala Meatloaf’s “Bless My Soul” in The Rocky Horror Picture Show. Well … waitaminnit, now … that was Meatloaf doing the song in this routine! Whatcha know ’bout dat!

Oh, good gordness. Tyce DiOrio shoving a Broadway routine Kent Boyd’s way. More freakin’ Broadway. And with a baseball theme, even. *sigh* Just shoot me now. You know how there’s no crying in baseball? Well … there shouldn’t be any dancing in it, either. Holy crap.

Hokay … now comes pair-ups with the contestants. Can I get through this last portion of the show? Help me….

First up: Lauren and Billy. And guess what? Fun routine! Nothing pretentious … nothing competitive; or so it seemed. Yet … Lauren out-danced Billy in this little stint. I almost got up and started dancing my own-self to K.C. And The Sunshine Band’s “Boogie Shoes.” Thankfully, I’m alone in my living room with no witnesses….

Jose and all-star Dominic pair off in an all B-Boy war. And given his first performance — the awful Broadway routine noted above — Jose put it out there on the table and shoved everything back into the competition where it belonged. There was no doubt about this routine compared to the previous one.

AdéChiké and Kent duet with chairs. Moreso, it was a quartet with chairs. Very interesting routine. Kent performed just as wonderfully as I’ve ever seen him. Ade? The same. Both of them did marvelously.

Lastly, we have Ashley and Robert disco-tripping the night fantastic … or we would have, if Ashley hadn’t hurt herself during rehearsals. So, Robert is instead paired with all-star Kathryn. And, yeah: it was disco. Nigel was right in stating we don’t appreciate how tough a disco routine is. And you know what? I’m all right with that. The last flailing routine of the evening.

So … Ashley’s in the Bottom Three by default with her injury. Robert will wind up there once again. Just a hunch, but Billy probably will be, too.

Tune in tonight to see who makes The Top Six!!!

Clacked by Michael Noble
on Jul 15, 2010 @ 12:00 EST5EDT