Survivor – Completely bum-puzzled

I think a better headline for this episode of Survivor is “What the frak just happened?!” Wow! I’m really speechless — and I have plenty to say about Colton that I’ll keep private — about what went down this week. I had posed the question back when I first suggested Colton was going to be this season’s super villain (do the naysayers still disagree or think that assessment was too early to call?) that perhaps he would suggest throwing a challenge in order to vote Matt out. Of course, he didn’t have to do that since the women trounced the guys last week and Matt was sent packing without demoralizing the tribe. But to win immunity and hand it to the other tribe in order to vote someone out??? Unbelievable!

It really looked like the women were going to dominate again this week as they easily beat the men for the reward (they finally have their tarp). But the tables turned when the men flew through the immunity challenge, leaving the women in the dust — still working on the second of three puzzles — as they completed the challenge. It seemed that Miss Big Mouth Alicia was going to get her just desserts after becoming upset with Kat for misunderstanding her concern about not being smart enough to do a puzzle. Alicia was all up on her case, and then Alicia basically lost the challenge by not being able to complete a puzzle … even after looking at the men’s completed work! (And, seriously, someone needs to muzzle Tarzan. Calling the women cheaters for looking at the completed puzzle? Come on, even Jeff suggested they look at it for help!) But then something strange happened.

Turns out Leif and Bill had done some bonding and Leif let it slip that Bill was the original target at the last Tribal, and that Colton wanted him gone next. Mike, who knew he was third in line, took the opportunity to stir up the hornet’s next by telling Colton about the conversation. Colton confronted Leif and basically told him he had sealed his own fate, but the win in the challenge seemed to have put that plan on the back burner. Seemed. Somehow, Colton got the idea in his head that it would be worth giving up immunity to go to Tribal and take out the traitor, and his Misfit Tribe members agreed … what else could they do?

I’m still not sure what exactly happened at Tribal. Jeff was agog when the men showed up, telling them this could be the single dumbest move in Survivor‘s 24-season history. The men all discussed Leif’s betrayal and that he had to go because no one could trust him anymore. But somehow, the conversation became centered on Colton’s animosity towards Bill — Bill is poor, Bill sleeps on friends’ couches, Bill doesn’t have a real job, Bill is black … oops, he didn’t say that but he might as well have, especially after the conversation got directed toward Colton’s apparently racist leanings by Jeff. It really became a bit uncomfortable, and I kind of liked Tarzan getting a bit heated about being sick of race being such an issue in this country. But there it was. I can’t really remember Bill doing anything to Colton from day one that would cause such animosity, so either this boy from the Deep South (who is gay and should be more accepting, no?) had a run-in with Bill that we never saw on the show, or his hatred of Bill is based on race whether he wants to admit it or not. We also weren’t shown something else … the discussion between the men that Bill was the one going home. All the way up to and during Tribal, the finger was pointed at Leif until Jeff asked about the tension between Bill and Colton. Ultimately, Colton’s real plan worked and Bill was sent packing for all the wrong reasons.

My biggest question now is why are the men letting Colton run the show like this? He has a hidden immunity idol? So what! He thinks he’s secure, he’s not going to use it, blindside the jackass! He’s worthless around camp, and now he’s making irrational decisions. This would have been the perfect chance to get rid of him, especially after seeing how he acted towards Bill for no good reason. Now the men are cowering because one wrong move could send any of them packing. Who’s to say Colton won’t try to pull this little stunt again? They have now given him the power to do what he wants, so his plan of using that hidden immunity idol as a weapon/shield is working exactly as he planned. He might be the season’s super villain now, but Colton is also showing what a despicable person he truly is. If the men don’t take the chance to blindside him at the next Tribal Council, then they’ll get exactly what they deserve … a one-way ticket home.

“That little Munchkin is about to get knocked back to Oz.” — Colton, after Mike tells him about the conversation between Leif and Bill

“Alicia is just dead weight with a mouth.” — Sabrina

“But I do have, like, African-American people in my life.” — Colton
“Who?” — Jeff
[laughing] “My housekeeper.” — Colton

“But she’s like a member of our family.” — Colton
“A paid member.” — Jeff

Clacked by Chuck Duncan
on Mar 07, 2012 @ 22:18 EST5EDT