Spotlight Show of the Night
Cops (FOX, 8:00 p.m./7:00 p.m. Central) – We’ve all seen those sappy Christmas specials and movies and cartoons and it’s always the same thing. So why not tune into Christmas Cops style! How’s this for holiday cheer? The Minneapolis PD are setting up a prostitution string to catch a bunch of hookers.
“Christmas Christmas time is here.
Time for whores and time for beer.
For twenty bucks you make this last.
Wait, the cops are here, just make it fast.
I’ve had 12 beers, they can’t catch me,
I’ll run this way and then be free.
Oh shit, the curb, how’d that get there.
They’ve caught me now, this isn’t fair.”
Beginnings, Endings & Specials
2008: The Year in Animals (Animal Planet, 10:00 p.m./9:00 p.m. Central) – The best animal stories of the year.
Alien Agent (Sci Fi, 7:00 p.m./6:00 p.m. Central) – An intergalactic warrior hooks up with a 15-year old girl to protect the earth from an alien invasion. I wonder if this is a documentary?
Crash: The Next Great Depression? (The History Channel, 10:00 p.m./9:00 p.m. Central) – We could be on the precipice right now. The History Channel looks back at the ’29 stock market crash and subsequent depression with an eye on the ’08 economic crisis.
G4 Investigates (G4, 10:00 p.m./9:00 p.m. Central) – This special takes a look at real life fight clubs that have broken out in Silicon Valley. Now I’m not sure how they were able to put together this special since everyone knows the first rule of Silicon Valley Fight Club.
The Greatest Game Ever Played (ESPN, 9:00 p.m./8:00 p.m. Central) – With restored footage and interviews with key players, this look back on the 50-year anniversary of the 1958 Colts-Giants NFL Championship game is a must-see for true football fans.
The Heisman Trophy Presentation (ESPN, 8:00 p.m./7:00 p.m. Central) – Chris Fowler hosts the 74th annual celebration honoring the best college football player of the year.
Hollywood Does Christmas (We, 9:00 p.m./8:00 p.m. Central) – We check in to see how the holidays are handled by people in Hollywood who were really exciting … at one time. People like Kirstie Alley, Michelle Pfeiffer, Rachel Hunter, Jeff Goldblum, Leeza Gibbons and Daryll Hannah. Hey look, it’s the ’90s again!
It’s a Wonderful Life (NBC, 8:00 p.m./7:00 p.m. Central) – It’s a classic! And it is a wonderful life.
A Miser Brothers Christmas (ABC Family, 8:00 p.m./7:00 p.m. Central) -The Miser Brothers have to fill in for Santa when North Wind sabotages his new advanced-model sleigh. Remember when Christmas specials involved elves who wanted to be dentists?
The Most Wonderful Time of the Year (The Hallmark Channel, 9:00 p.m./8:00 p.m. Central) – Brooke Burns and Henry Winkler star in a holiday movie about a single mom who welcomes a total stranger in her home simply because her uncle befriended him on a plane. Because that happens.
NASCAR – The Ride of Their Lives (CMT, 9:00 p.m./8:00 p.m. Central) – Kevin Costner narrates this two hour special chronicling the history and rise of NASCAR. It also includes snippets from some of the sport’s most legendary figures, so true fans should definitely tune in.
Radio City Christmas Spectacular (We, 8:00 p.m./7:00 p.m. Central) -It’s the 75th year of the Radio City Christmas Spectacular, so how did this thing end up on We? Nothing against We, but this used to be network fare. Beauty pageants and girls kicking in unison not good enough for the big boys? What if Jay Leno were hosting. NBC’d pick it up for sure then.
Trading Spaces: Christmas Special (10:00 p.m./9:00 p.m. Central) – What makes it special? How about an extra $500 to decorate the oustide for Christmas. That’s it. Pretty special, huh?
The Ultimate Fighter (Spike, 9:00 p.m./8:00 p.m. Central, 8th Season Finale) – It’s a three-hour season finale. Who will be the Ultimate Fighter? Rosie O’Donnell? After she wins she’ll write a haiku about the experience.
The Whale That Exploded (National Geographic Channel, 8:00 p.m./7:00 p.m. Central) – You read that right. A sperm whale on its way to a lab for study in Taiwan exploded out of nowhere. Scientists ask: “What’s up with that?”
Will You Merry Me? (Lifetime, 9:00 p.m./8:00 p.m. Central) -It’s a movie about Christmas with the in-laws. That’s all I got. And that amazingly clever name. See, ’cause ‘Merry’ is for Christmas but it’s usually ‘Marry’ so it’s like a proposal only Christmas style. God, that’s genius!
Sports, Movies & New Shows
8:00 p.m./7:00 p.m. Central
9:00 p.m./8:00 p.m. Central
10:00 p.m./9:00 p.m. Central
Now this posting format is much better than the last few days. 6 shows is too few to list. If you’re looking for something to omit start with the reality listings. Maybe have Jackie post those listings separately. Just an idea.
Oops, I meant earlier in the week, not the last few days. I gave up on them when you started listing only 6 shows.