When it comes to having kids, one size doesn’t fit all – SATC week

by Rachel Blum-Jose

When I watched 'Sex and the City' in its heyday, I was a twenty-something without children. Now, as a thirty-something with two kids, I reexamine how the show portrays each character's feelings about raising a family.

“I don’t think I’d be very good at this. Am I maternal? … When I was a little girl, I left my favorite baby doll out in the rain for four days. Her face peeled off. This can’t be good.” — Carrie

Finally, there’s Carrie.

It seems as though Carrie isn’t sure one way or the other how she feels about having children. The few times she discusses it — either with her friends, or internally — is when she thinks there is a “problem.”

The first time Carrie comes face to face with dealing with the “kid issue” is in Season 1’s “The Baby Shower.” She’s late with her period and tries to figure out not only if she wants kids, but if she’s even fit to be a mother. “I shaved my Barbie’s head when I was mad at her,” she confesses.

The above screen shot shows Carrie on a park bench, watching a bunch of kids play (yes, I have seen this episode enough times to know that that’s what she’s doing). I always found this funny. When I used to watch kids play, I thought, “Hey, there are some kids playing.” Not, “This is what being a mom will be like.” (Turns out I was even more off-base than I initially though about “what being a mom will be like.”) Carrie gets her period at the end of the episode, so she doesn’t have to answer that question just yet.

However, when she starts dating Aleksandr Petrovsky in Season 6, she finds out he has a grown daughter — and also that he has had a vasectomy in order to prevent ever having more. Even though they are not exactly serious when she discovers this, she thinks they may someday be serious enough to discuss having children. Would she want to be with someone who never wanted kids again? That would be like her deciding at that moment that she would never be a mother.

As the main character of the series, Carrie is who many women look to as a reflection of themselves. However, the beauty of SATC is how any of the four women can, and do, represent a number of viewers. Whether you’re a woman who desperately wants children, one who could never imagine it, or somewhere in between, you can identify with the characters.

As for me? I’m definitely somewhere between a Miranda and a Charlotte. It’s not as though I’ve been waiting my entire life to become a mom, and it’s not usually the first thing I say when people ask me “what I do” or to talk about myself. I always knew that at some point I would want to have children, though. It’s all about balance. While I understand that sometimes, my social life, free time, and dinners out will have to wait, I also know that I can only be the best mom if I remain true to myself and my personality, which is what Miranda brings to the table as a mom. For me, you’ve got to tackle motherhood with humor and wit, and that’s definitely Miranda’s approach.